November 27, 2010 at 8:46 PM (Our Journey)
Tags: 2 months old, Gestational Surrogacy, Surrogacy, Surrogate Baby
Little piggy is growing Mama says he is weighing in at 12 pounds 1 ounce. Enzo is getting close to three months old now. How the time is flying! Here is a current photo of the little (big) man:
Professional photos taken shortly after E’s birth:
When I text, talk, and see pictures of how Enzo and his family are doing and what they are up too, I feel so happy. We’ve all been blessed through this and we know we have a lot to be thankful for.
October 27, 2010 at 9:54 PM (Our Journey)
Tags: Dads surrogacy, Gestational Surrogacy, Surrogacy Support
Most of the time it is women who you come across in the surrogacy support groups because we women tend to want to share every single feeling we have and men for the most part don’t but that doesn’t mean that every step of whatever process baby making takes that our men aren’t affected too. From all the surrogate moms to their men, thanks for ALL YOU DO to help us help other men get to join the club too. We love you!
© Pocketbebe, 2010
October 24, 2010 at 9:31 PM (Our Journey)
Tags: breast feeding, Gestational Surrogacy, post partum, post surrogacy, pumping, surrogacy blogs
It has been a long weekend friends, I am tired and when I get tired I tend to wax nostalgic.
My mother-in-law is in town as it had been planned for her to help me control the troops when Enzo was born but since he came early it has turned more into a fun trip. We were at the beach last weekend to celebrate instead of give birth and this weekend we went to Sea World.
There were a lot of pregnant ladies at Sea World and I am not pregnant anymore; I am 7 weeks postpartum with a flabby wiggly belly and an extra ten pounds of pure fat. I was jealous. I found myself wanting to be the fully pregnant person riding around the park in the Rascal motor scooter; I wanted to shove that cute little thing in trendy maternity clothing to the ground and steal her cart and her pregnant belly. While I am also still wearing maternity clothing and I get to carry the trendy backpack pump and pump milk in the name of world hunger (well, Enzo’s hunger anyway) I’m just not pregnant anymore and there is a lot I like about being pregnant. The only good news is that I FINALLY quit the gross postpartum bleed and I no longer feel like I’m walking around swearing I smell like rusty metal. Plus there is the sex thing..Hubba Hubba.
Bump Fairy, Sabrina, had baby Thomas this past week for Mama Jaymee and I’ve alternated tears at reading their journey and seeing their amazing photos with literally almost peeing my pants during the Pet’s Ahoy show at Sea World reading about her “morning boob” (yes, during the show I was on my phone reading blogs. I’ve seen the show a zillion times now I could recite it in my sleep. Variety would be nice folks). Sabrina was the last one left I was following with a similar due date, it all feels very much over now and all that being said, it doesn’t really have much to do with Enzo himself. I was a conduit for Lucy and Ricky to grow Enzo and Enzo was a conduit for me to be a part of a very amazing experience and group of women. Other than Surro Friend who lives down the road from me, I’ve never met a single one of these ladies (or boys in IF’s Mike and Robbie’s case) in person and yet I find myself wanting to round up Sabrina, Jaymee, Leana, Leslie, Erica, Jeniffer, Selena, Mike & Robbie, John & Amy, and all the rest of you to have drinks and chat like old friends.
That brings me to answering a few questions I get a lot now that the surrogacy is over, do I think I will be a surrogate again? The truthful answer is I don’t know. Do I want to be a surrogate again? Absolutely. Why would I want to be a surrogate again? Even though I try to tell you all, it is really something beyond indescribable but it is not only the immense satisfaction I received for myself and Lucy and Ricky received in Enzo, this is what drove and would drive me to do it again the most,
“If you are going to be used by God, he will take you through a multitude of experiences that are not meant for you at all; they are meant to make you useful in his hands.” Oswald Chambers
My future plans must be in partnership with His, but I wouldn’t cry if that meant another surrogacy was in the future for me. Holy Schnikes, I probably just gave my entire support system outside of the surrogacy world a heart attack (they all love me tons and therefore worry). Surrogacy world knows exactly where I am coming from and nodding their heads in understanding. Too funny! Everyone relax, just because I would do it again doesn’t mean I will. 
So, Leana and Leslie are up to bat with delivering their surro babies now and Mike & Robbie have switched their blogging over to Lillian The Beautiful since she is has arrived.
Pictures of Enzo’s discharge day from the NICU:
Here is The Husband the next morning after he had his appendix removed and was being discharged from the hospital. He is going to kill me by the way for posting this.
© Pocketbebe, 2010
October 18, 2010 at 9:59 PM (Our Journey, Surrogate Education)
Tags: 34 weeks, birth, Gestational Surrogacy, intended mother, labor, Pitocin, surrogate
UPDATE: Enzo was discharged from the hospital Thursday evening and they returned home. Lucy told me this weekend that he was starting to get his appetite back but still had a cough. Tonight she told me he is back to taking four ounces at a time again. Please continue to pray for their family and for some normalcy.
This past Friday, October 15, was Enzo’s due date and instead of arriving at the birthing center for a water birth, I arrived for my six week postpartum appointment. There were two women there giving birth and usually when someone goes in to have a baby they cancel all the remaining appointments for the day but since it takes me two hours to drive there I was still allowed to come (plus I think they wanted to see pictures). It was a little bitter sweet as our midwives had wanted to deliver us as much as we wanted to deliver there. Lucy and I had mourned our loss of that dream while in the hospital but it was so very sweet to see that other people were just as disappointed as we had been. In the end though he arrived healthy and happy; well, until that nasty virus got him a week ago but that is a separate issue. All checked out great and that was the end of our birthing center chapter.
I’m still pumping milk for Enzo. I don’t know if this is the absolute truth but a book I read said that when a woman delivers a preemie for the first four weeks the milk is obviously geared exactly for that preemie and contains a lot more protein than full term milk would but after just four weeks (no matter how early baby arrived) it is no different than the milk at 40 weeks gestation would be. I pumped every three hours when I started pumping to build up a supply because I wanted to express as much of that preemie milk as I could before the four weeks were up. My highest producing day was 56 ounces (I’m using the Medela Symphony pump) but my average was about 48 ounces a day and it was A LOT of work and physically tiring. Now, I am only pumping three times a day and I’m only yielding 20 to 24 ounces a day but it is what works for me and what fits into my schedule. To answer everyone’s question, I do not know how long I am going to pump for. To answer another potential question, this is normal in the surrogacy world. Lucy is still pumping and breastfeeding also. I’ll do a post in the future about storing and shipping breast milk but I thought you might like to hear about my recent shipping experience.
I was in the Fed-X shipping store and the Fed-X guy came while I was there. I had three heavy coolers in boxes containing dry ice and something around 800 ounces of frozen milk. I had written on the boxes, FRAGILE HUMAN MILK and the Fed-X guy goes, “What is human milk?” and the lady (remember I live in redneck central) goes, “It’s breast milk dumbass.” Without missing a beat he turns to me and asks, “How many gallons of that there breast milk are ya shipping?” So, Fed-X guy thinks I’m at home filling plastic milk jugs with boobie milk. This mental image starts to crack me up and then I notice he is eyeing my rack as if he plans on taking a guess and if he’s right that I might give him some sort of stuffed pony. As I left though I began to wonder just how many gallons of milk it really was… when I went home and converted it, it was almost 6 ½ gallons of milk that I had collected in the previous 14 day grind. Six and a half friggin’ gallons!! Yeah, I’m pretty dang proud of that accomplishment. I should earn a patch for my sash, I could help feed a small third world country.
Ok, so what you are really here for is to find out about Enzo’s actual birth day. Day three of the induction ended around nine at night and I was able to eat and take a shower. At midnight began day four of the induction. I was super excited that they were beginning Pitocin at midnight but was quickly deflated when I found out they were only going to go up to half the maximum dosage and keep me at that until six in the morning. Urgh!!! Annoying because I had to be on the monitor (contraction and heartbeat) while on the Pitocin and that meant that I wouldn’t hardly be sleeping. Those six hours slowly dragged by and eventually they started upping it slowly. From here, I don’t remember the time frames of things. I started having contractions according to the monitor but they still didn’t hurt so we didn’t get our hopes up. Then I stood up for a bit and they started to get stronger and then within a few minutes were coming faster and faster. They didn’t last very long but as soon as I had finished a contraction another one was starting. I was leaning on the bed when I’d have a contraction and the monitors would come off the baby and all I can remember thinking is that if Lucy were watching the monitor when I leaned forward she would be freaking out. When it was at the point where I was only just beginning labor but the frequency and intensity was exactly like transition phase I just knew the labor experience was going to get ugly before we reached the actual birth. At that point I was only at ¾ of the maximum dose and they had no intention of not reaching that maximum dose to ensure I progressed with labor and I could not imagine having to endure the full dosage with worse contractions for HOURS. I talked with the nurse about the epidural and I was only willing not to have the epidural if it meant I would have to stay the night at the hospital after delivering Enzo – remember I also had a husband in intense pain on the cusp of having his appendix removed. So, the epidural was called in for me and the Epi man was in emergency c-section surgery and had another c-section to do before he could get to me. OMG, that was the longest hour in my life and my husband couldn’t even take a break from rubbing my back because the contractions felt like they never stopped. When he finally got there I just remember sharply sucking my breath in and arching my back during the numbing injection. I think it was around eleven or eleven thirty and I believe I was four cm when she checked me after the epidural. I know I told The Husband to tell Lucy and Ricky to come then. I’m not sure but I think they came, left to grab lunch and then came back again. I do know that at 1:30 I felt the right kind of pressure and told the nurse but she didn’t check me. Right before two Ricky was going to go back to the condo and pack his bags because he, Little Ricky, and Auntie were going to be flying back to Miami at the end of the day. He was going out the door right at two when the midwife came in to check me. She told the nurse a few more contractions and he would have been delivered on the bed. Lucy called Ricky and stopped him in the parking lot and in less than two minutes I swear that room was transformed and the entire NICU team was ready. It was quite impressive. Two pushes and Enzo was crowning. It felt like an eternity after the second push while we had to wait for the next contraction for me to push and his head was half out and I remember thinking there was no way in hell I would have been able to do that had I not had an epidural. If I could of felt that fire I would have been pushing, contraction or not to get past that pain. When the contraction came I had just started when they told me to stop and right out he came. The birth time was 2:12. The midwife sat him on me for a second and cut and clamped the cord and he went right into the warmer as the team started to examine him. He was crying the minute he came out and scored a 9 on his first apgar. Ricky did the final cord cutting and Lucy was taking pictures the entire time. She got Enzo and they were holding him and it was so exciting to see her with him finally. She had tears in her eyes and when she brought him close for me to see, I got tears in mine. My husband was excited and was taking pictures, it made me giddy because that excitement was what I got to experience the entire time. It was so incredibly happy and amazing. I asked the midwife to show me the placenta after it was delivered and Lucy was curious to see it too as Enzo had so loved shoving his face into it. Something interesting that she showed us as we examined it was that the cord wasn’t attached to the placenta smack in the middle like it usually is it was attached to the placenta near the edge of it right next to where the amniotic sac was attached. We asked her if that was where the tear was that caused me to leak fluid but she said it was impossible to tell. It was interesting to note though and may have been the reason since no other reason was found for it rupturing premature. Enzo’s second apgar score was 9 also and then before I knew it the team wanted to take him to the NICU to get him on monitors to see his temp and start his antibiotic.
I received one stitch for a small tear and was put back on a small dose of Pitocin to help contract the uterus and seal off some of those blood vessels. My catheter was removed and then the epidural turned off. Shortly the girl came to remove the epidural. Then my IV line was removed and I went to the bathroom. I was brought dinner and I was able to eat. After that I was able to shower and we began to pack up. Lucy and Ricky had been in the NICU most of the rest of the afternoon and eventually Ricky had to leave for the airport with Little Ricky and Auntie. Lucy’s mom and dad had arrived and left to get dinner. I was discharged and Lucy, The Husband, and I were able to go into the NICU to see Enzo (pictures of that in last post) and I cried at how little and perfect he looked (ironically right after Lucy commented on how big he was). That was the smallest baby I had ever delivered.
When I started talking to him he opened his eyes and Lucy mentioned that he recognized my voice. I write about that because I think if I were Lucy, that might have made me jealous but Lucy has never been that way with me. I couldn’t tell you how many times she has expressed to me that she loves that there is another woman that her son is connected to. This isn’t uncommon in surrogacy but it also isn’t the norm and I really feel so blessed to have the relationship with Lucy that I do. We are Sister Moms.
After visiting Enzo it was time for us to leave and go home. Lucy and I had joked all week that it felt like when this moment came it was going to feel like we were breaking up. Lucy and I will be forever friends but our relationship was now shifting from what it had been to what it would be now and it was weird as we walked out the doors to know that that moment was now. When The Husband and I finally left the hospital that night just six hours after delivering Enzo, we went grocery shopping at Publix.
P.S. Bump Fairy is in labor! Make sure to keep watch on her blog and her IM’s blog – My Surrogacy Adventure. Thinking about you ladies!
© Pocketbebe, 2010
October 7, 2010 at 9:10 PM (Our Journey)
Tags: Cytotec, Day 3 Induction, Foley Catheter Balloon, Gestational Surrogacy, Induction
Back to the birth story….If you remember, last time I left off after writing about 2 days of full dosage Pitocin without much progress other then setting Pitocin receptors into place. Day three was time to do something else but let me sidebar for a second….
The night I went into the hospital I was 33 weeks and a few hours away from 4 days pregnant. After calling Lucy and telling her that I was pretty sure I was leaking fluid and we were all headed to the hospital, she contacted her friend who is part of the maternal fetal medicine world (aka high risk obstetrics). After talking to her, she found out that the recommendation according to ACOG (American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists) standards for a 34 week pregnant woman who entering the hospital leaking fluid and contracting would be to deliver the baby. After I arrived and was admitted phone orders were given for steroids, antibiotic, and if the monitor showed I was contracting they wanted to give me magnesium sulfate to stop the contractions. Around this time my husband was freaking out because the nurse was telling him that if they could get the contractions to stop the doctors sometimes keep patients pregnant up to 37 weeks…this would translate to 3 weeks and 3 days of me in the hospital. I’m surprised he didn’t have a stroke right then and there. Lucy was telling me to refuse the magnesium sulfate which accounted for standoff number one with a particular nurse I will now name, Miss KIA (Know It All). At any rate, Miss Kia and I had a stand-off once the monitor showed I was contracting and she wanted to follow the orders to give me the magnesium. In a haughty five minute go-round in which my intelligence was questioned more than once, the debate ended with me telling her to go type up whatever papers I needed to sign because no matter what she said or threatened me with I was going to go against my mystery doctor’s orders and contract. I willed Lucy to get there……… As you know from previous posting, the contractions stopped on their own.
A few days later and after more consultation with Lucy’s friend, Yogi (the high risk doctor), we decided we were going to speak to the OB I’d been assigned to and see if he would give orders at 34 weeks to induce me. Enzo’s fluid level was very good but I was sitting with ruptured membranes, each day waiting to see if infection might set in. Enzo had received the two dosages of steroids for his lungs and the pediatrician in Lucy felt it was better for him to be out than in. We did not agree with the “keep the baby in for as long as possible” plan of treatment. Either way it was diced, there were potential complications and risk. In a gray area we wanted to be proactive, rather than wait on infection and then be potentially forced to have to become more invasive and reactive. I asked a nurse what she thought the OB’s reaction might be if we approached him to see if he would induce; she was skeptical he would and then went and gave them a heads up. Tsk, tsk little Miss Kia. Just a quick fyi, when your 33 weeks and deliver a baby the OB doctor has to be in attendance but when your 34 weeks the midwife who works under an OB can deliver- which in my case was a bonus because my first impression of the OB hadn’t been stellar. The second impression didn’t turn out much better because when OB and midwife caught wind of what we wanted to talk to them about they came into my room guns blazing (of course when Lucy wasn’t there) and the OB doctor himself had a complete and total hissy (hissy is not the word that does justice here) fit/tantrum that rivals those of my four year old. He made majorly inappropriate and off based comments. I seriously had to pick my jaw up off the ground, I had never seen a spectacle so unprofessional; his arms were waving all around, eye twitching. Juno fans, he was giving me MAJOR STINK EYE. I was MAD. Ok, really… I was beyond F-ing mad. How dare he talk about my Baby Mama and me that way!? But, he was doing such a good job of making an ass of himself I was able to stay calm (and fight back any tears that wanted to well up at the injustice of being bombarded like that), reminded him of all of Lucy’s medical credentials (which was like poking a wild bear) and the standards of ACOG (which he damn well knew). I informed him (insides shaking) that what we were asking wasn’t wrong, just the other side of how he normally chooses to handle things.
I wanted sooooo bad to throw out that we’d been receiving maternal fetal consult the entire time but knew it was a card I needed to hold otherwise I risked sending him over the edge and not getting what we wanted without a bigger battle. I did however verbalize that an induction was something we just wanted to have a conversation about not an argument over and that now I wasn’t sure how I felt having about two pissed off people, guns blazing as the ones who were eventually going to be the ones delivering the baby. The last thing I wanted was some doctor with a chip on his shoulder deciding to teach me a lesson with an unnecessary episiotomy or something entirely crazy. The tone changed a lot after I said that and the midwife realized the OB was being pretty extreme and unprofessional and she started backtracking and smoothing things over. Hands flung in the air as he was walking out of the room he said, “Fine, I’ll give the orders at 34 weeks and you can deliver her.” That was pretty much my last dealing with the OB doctor other than he popped back in a few minutes later and asked if this was my fourth pregnancy (he was debating the use of a particular drug…more on that later) and was gone with the wind. Whatever – *finger and thumb in the shape of an L on my forehead*. Yeah, that was a Smash Mouth reference.
During this time there was a lot of talk about using a drug called Cytotec (big gasp for some of you non druggers out there – get it out of your system). The OB had had a few patients that experienced some complications when using it and he decided that this being my fourth pregnancy that I wasn’t a candidate for it. The entire time I was in the hospital our birthing center down by Tampa and the midwives there were keeping tabs on us, leaving messages they were praying for us and wanting to be kept informed on what was happening. So one of our original midwives had been explaining all the various routes, options, and anything I might need to know. She didn’t agree that the particular drug being talked about was out of the running and advised that we tell the midwife now in charge of my care (under temper tantrum OB) that we wanted a maternal fetal consult. Par for the course, the nurse changing my IV bag overheard me on the phone and passed the word on to the midwife who apparently agreed with the use of the Cytotec and just went ahead and had the consult with their maternal fetal contact in Tampa who in turn gave input on exactly how to carry out the induction which the midwife followed to a T. I guess I will never know who that doctor exactly was but I am very thankful for their expertise because I truly think it was thanks to her that Enzo made it out the way he did.
OK, BACK TO THE MAIN POINT AFTER THAT FOUR PARAGRAPH SIDEBAR.
CROTCH WATCH: The plan for day three of the induction was to use a Foley catheter kit and place the tip of it up inside my cervix, fill it like a balloon with saline, apply tension every half hour and when it popped out I would be around 2 cm dilated. The trick for the midwife was going to be getting it into the cervix because it was still so far back and not aligned with the vagina. It took all of this short little woman’s strength and I’m fairly certain, her entire arm to get it in place. I had to cover my face because I couldn’t watch The Husband or Lucy watch me. I felt like a train wreck, the carnage on the side of the track that nobody really wants to look at but yet can’t pry their eyes away from. So, thankfully they got the darn thing in and they used a cord clamp at the end of it so fluid and goo wouldn’t come out and then put a rubber glove over that to catch any drainage. When I stood up later, Lucy and I totally lost it with delirious laughter; we took a picture (that I won’t scar you with) but I created a new Halloween idea for Howl-O-Scream, I WAS CROTCH HAND. I literally had a gloved looking hand hanging down out of my gown and by God that was the funniest thing to happen to us in an entire week.
Eventually the balloon popped out and I was dilated to 2 cm and after four small doses of rectal Cytotec, experienced lots of softening and thinning but no contractions. By 9 pm that was the end of induction day three and I was taken off the machines, all meds, and I got to eat for the first time since the night before.
Here are more pictures from Mr. Enzo’s birthday!
© Pocketbebe, 2010
September 13, 2010 at 10:48 AM (Our Journey)
Tags: Appendix, Birth day photos, Gestational Surrogacy
Enzo is 1 week old today. He was discharged from the NICU when he was five days old which was Friday and after taking my girls and Surro grandma to meet him, Enzo and his family made the drive home to Miami. Lucy said they were at the doctor this morning and he weighs 5 pounds 9.5 ounces now! He is a growing handsome boy. Here are some more pictures from the day he was born:
I apologize for not being on here to fill in the rest of the details to Enzo’s birth. I plan on doing it but it is going to take me a little bit to find the time. What I didn’t mention in the previous postings is that on the same night my water started leaking my husband also started feeling pain behind his belly button. It got worse through that day but kind-of got sidelined when we had to rush to the hospital for me that night. When we knew I was stable for the time being he was able to get into our family doctor who thought it could potentially be a few different things. A strained muscle, an ulcer, stones, but her feeling was appendix. He had his blood drawn and it showed an elevated white blood count. She suggested he have a CT scan. He came to the hospital where I was so if the scan indicated his appendix, he could have surgery there where I was located. According to the ER, the scan results didn’t indicate appendix and his white blood cells were now within the normal range. This was frustrating because he was clearly in pain and no solution was given. He then met with a local general surgeon who did an exam and indicated that he thought it was the appendix but thought maybe a consult with a GI doctor might be a better first stop before jumping to exploratory surgery.
We were relieved to have bought some time as I was desperate to have him with me during the induction that was scheduled to start the next day. He rested in the hospital with me and the pain became more manageable through the four day induction. We returned home Monday night after the birth and he returned to working some until the GI appointment on Friday. We went to our daughter’s first golf match on Wednesday and it was blazing hot and then down poured on us and they had to call the match 7 holes in. Our daughter hopped in the golf cart with us and we had a ridiculous ride back to the clubhouse in sideways rain, both my husband and I joking but hanging on to our lower tummies for dear life swearing that we were both experiencing placental abruptions. Thursday I started pumping my milk to help supplement Enzo.
Friday we went to the GI doctor who upon examination of my husband (who got dizzy and almost puked when the doctor pressed on the appendix) declared that my husband should go to surgery that evening. I was still able to run to the other hospital for the kids to meet Enzo, drop off milk, and see them all again before heading home, dropping the kids off to grandpa and taking The Husband to the local hospital. He was in surgery around 8 and done by 8:40. It WAS his appendix and it was removed. I was able to be with him in recovery and when they moved him to his room. It was around 11 pm when I left him in his bed with his 70 year-old, Irish roommate who was pumped up on painkillers singing tavern songs and pretty much acting belligerent. I wanted to cry, I hated leaving him there in so much pain, alone and with the annoying piano man. I prayed his own pain medicine would knock him close to unconscious. I was able to pick him up the next morning and we were home around 11:30 am.
I am so thankful for the timing on everything and how just surrendering the details over to God has in the end made this whole thing somewhat manageable. Our friends have been providing meals which has taken a huge monkey off my back as everything unfolded and been such a huge blessing. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I think today has been the first day that I have been able to just breathe and actually rest from the events of the past two weeks. I am doing well and feel very grateful. As time permits this week, I’d like to finish up the birth story so I have it all documented before I forget it or it all turns into a blur. Thanks for the all the well wishes and the prayers.
© Pocketbebe, 2010
September 2, 2010 at 6:37 PM (Our Journey, Surrogate Education)
Tags: 34 weeks, Gestational Surrogacy, NICU, premature delivery
Tomorrow is 34 weeks (full term is 40) and this textbook baby carrying mama is having her first brush with prematurity. At noon tomorrow Enzo will be encouraged with a pitocin drip to make his way out to greet his family.
Sunday night I was helping my oldest daughter with her homework when out of the clear blue sky I felt a little gush. I was shocked because I thought I had just peed in my pants and well, I haven’t done that in awhile. I quickly resigned myself to the fact that while I’d kept the hemorrhoids and constipation at bay it was now my pregnancy lot to pee in my pants for the next seven weeks. I changed, sat down, AND DID IT ALL OVER AGAIN! Then HELLO! I realized I was continuously dripping out amniotic fluid and I felt the beginning of cramping that would soon lead to contracting. Surro Grandma was called in and The Husband and I headed to the hospital while Lucy and Ricky headed north to meet us.
We picked between the two hospitals close to my house with a level 2 NICU and I was checked in and given a steroid injection for Enzo’s lungs though he was on the cusp of maybe not even needing it. A little later I had an ultrasound and the fluid level was very good despite the leak. We chose not to stop the contractions with medication. I flipped on my side, they stopped on their own.
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and today I have been on hospital bed rest and Lucy has been pumping a bit earlier than expected to get her milk supply going. I have been receiving constant IV fluids, antibiotics because of the open rupture, and fetal monitoring. I received the second and last dose of steroids 24 hours after the first dose. I receive an ultrasound each morning to check the amniotic fluid levels and they have risen above what it was when I was first admitted by a little bit each day. Enzo is utilizing the IV fluids to keep himself floating nice and safe. They think Enzo may weigh around five pounds.
The decision to induce labor has been made amongst many sets of different risks to both Enzo and I, and it is a decision that both Enzo’s family and I feel very good with. We are excited about tomorrow.
Bed rest has been nothing close to a spa vacation but here are some pictures of Lucy and I making the most of the days.
If you want to receive the up to the minute details on how things go tomorrow you need to make your way over to the tool bar and subscribe to the blog via your email. Do this even if you already think you subscribe because I know most of my subscribers are on the old service and I know you don’t receive the new posts right away, sometimes it takes over 24 hours. I know because I am subscribed through both the old and new service. If you are already on the new service it will tell you and you have the advantage of seeing the posts the second I hit publish. We will keep you updated!
Wish us luck, say some prayers, and keep on working those rosary beads Grammy C, “Holdernute, we’re headed for the rhubarb patch!”
© Pocketbebe, 2010
August 27, 2010 at 1:01 PM (Our Journey, Surrogate Education)
Tags: 32 week 3D Ultrasound, 33 weeks gestation, Baby Shower, Floradix, Gestational Surrogacy, Iron
Today is 33 weeks, 33 WEEKS! Where is the time going and how is it going entirely too fast and way slow at the same time? There was a prenatal appointment on Wednesday and everything is looking great still. I gained two pounds and am pushing 160 now for a total gain of 25 pounds. Belly measured 31, Enzo is still head down, and his heartbeat was in the 140’s.
At the 30 week appointment (3 entire weeks ago now) we did the short version (finger prick) of the glucose testing and everything was great there but it showed up that my iron levels were a tad low. This happened at the end of my last pregnancy also but here is the cool thing, I didn’t get prescribed some honking nasty iron pill that would make me constipated. Instead, I get to take a semi-nasty shot of Floradix Iron + Herbs Liquid Extract Formula twice a day. It isn’t the best tasting thing on earth but it is non-constipating and full of lots of the B vitamins too. I swear it actually makes me feel good and I’m thankful not to be contorting myself into goofy positions just to be able to take a poo at this point though that however may still be on the horizon.
This past weekend Lucy had her baby shower and Surro Friend and I trekked our pregnant bellies down to Miami to celebrate with Lucy. It was kind-of a crazy trip down, I was using the Google directions application on my Blackberry and every time a text or email came in it made the instructions go wonky so we constantly had changing directions and needless to say we missed the fast route to Miami Beach and instead took a detour that felt like it lasted an eternity and was composed of nothing but potholes that killed our compressed bladders. We got to our hotel and were informed that we were moved to the hotel next door because they over booked. We ended up staying in a way nicer hotel, getting free breakfast buffet and free parking out of the deal which was great but in the meltdown that our afternoon was becoming it sure wasn’t convenient to have to go unload, check in next door, bring the car back for parking, and then walk back across the road again in what felt like 200 degree heat, plus spoiler alert nobody takes pity on two pregnant women in Miami. People like to stare at you but that is about the extent of it.
We were twenty minutes late to dinner at Brio which had me stressing because I hate to be late in situations like that. We did end up having a wonderful dinner with Lucy, Ricky, Little Ricky, Lucy’s parents, three aunties, a cousin, and Lucy’s friend A and her son who is the same age as Little Ricky (they were NICU buddies when they were born). After dinner we headed to an ultrasound at a local birthing center and everyone got to see Enzo.
There is not a time when Enzo doesn’t move around like crazy after I eat, EXCEPT when I am with his parents!! Once again he was smashing his adorable little face into his placenta and hardly wanted to be bothered. I was on my side, on my back, you name it; I could have been standing on my head and he probably wouldn’t have moved. They got a few good shots though and here they are for you to see.
Surro friend and I were tired by the time we got back to the hotel but we didn’t get to bed for another hour because first we had demagnetized our room keys by placing them next to her phone in her purse and once we got that handled I realized I didn’t even have my phone which meant we needed to walk back next door to the other hotel, ask the valet to get our car, find the phone, and ask for it to be parked again before walking back past the creepy cab drivers hanging out on the corner between the hotels and being able to hit the hay.
Sunday morning, the day of Lucy’s shower, we ate our free breakfast and hit the pool to catch some sun and celebrate Surro Friend’s birthday. We each had a virgin strawberry daiquiri and took a dip in the ocean before getting ready for the shower.
Lucy’s shower was thrown by her mom and friend A. It was held at a Greek restaurant called, Thira. It was really beautiful and they had everything set up so nice and decorated in blue. Lucy and I both wore pink which I guess is a little odd since Enzo is a boy but the pink really popped against the blue decorations and I think we looked good. When Lucy arrived everyone started clapping and I got a little teary because it was so awesome that Lucy got to have that moment and a baby shower. When Little Ricky was born premature she didn’t get to have the traditional shower and I was just so happy that she was having that one. I won’t lie either, it is pretty amazing to get to be the person who plays a big part in the whole shebang; it is something I will never forget. She smiled and looked beautiful of course, glowing really. Lucy has a great support system and everyone was so nice and wonderful, I loved them all. Enzo is beyond loved as is his older brother. We played a few games, listened to music, and Lucy opened her gifts and before we knew it we were back in the car and headed north.
It was really a fun 24 + hours even though it was a whirlwind and it took me two days to recover from it. I promise to write sooner than later, did I mention that I have a child who is in middle school now? At any rate, I’m just trying to survive her schedule and believe me, I’d rather be writing sometimes instead of trying to keep it all straight.
© Pocketbebe, 2010
August 9, 2010 at 7:03 PM (Our Journey)
Tags: Gestational Surrogacy, Pregnancy Stupids
Just want to reiterate because for whatever reason it seems to get lost in translation somehow, surrogate baby Enzo is NOT genetically related to me or The Husband. Their bun, my oven….
I’m also hoping that it doesn’t get any worse than this but the pregnancy stupid that takes the cake this week is when I was getting ready to cut my husband’s hair the other day and we were chatting away about a million different things AND I forgot to put the guard on the clippers for the very first strip… Thankfully we clip him pretty short but NOT no guard short. I about died and I faded that patch and the rest of his hair like I’ve never faded a haircut before. Praises that things like that don’t faze my husband, that his hair grows wicked fast, and that he wears a ballcap everyday for work.
Prenatal appointment on Wednesday!
© Pocketbebe, 2010
August 5, 2010 at 7:38 AM (Our Journey, Surrogate Education)
Tags: Gestational Surrogacy, Surrogate Birthing
I’ve been awake since 4 am, wide awake. Nobody talks about this very often and it goes beyond the bladder being flattened out by baby and having to constantly go to the bathroom. Sometimes I will be fully awake and alert during the middle of the night at the end of a pregnancy and I think it is another way the body prepares a person for needing to be awake during the night after delivery to take care of baby. I wish there was some sort of factory setting button that I could switch off to let my body know, “Hey body, surrogacy in progress here, no need to prepare me for the lack of sleep because once baby vacates you we will actually get to sleep a lot. Capish?”
I know I just posted yesterday but I will be leaving this afternoon for a convention and when I return school will start for the kids and then we will have our 30 week prenatal appointment and this post would get put off in lieu of telling you what happened at the appointment, etc., etc., etc.
This post is a follow-up post to Birthing 101 where I detailed what The Husband and I learned in birthing class and I how I turn into a crotchety witch who is very demanding of her husband when in labor. Now, that is just the first layer, let’s talk about the second layer…the co-birth.
Let me set the stage for a second. If all goes properly planned as we all hope it does, at the birthing center in the birthing room on the day of delivery will be me, The Husband, Lucy, Ricky, our midwife, the birthing assistant, and the photographer who is taking the combined pregnancy, delivery, and newborn photos for Lucy. I’m not sure if Lucy and Ricky will have any of their other family at the center waiting to meet Enzo or not but I don’t think any of my family will meet him until we have all been released from the birthing center. My only hope post delivery is that it works out to get my kids down to the Tampa area to visually see Enzo and meet him before the Ricardo’s head back to Miami; kind-of that full circle moment.
Now, back to the concept of going through labor and delivery of someone else’s child and having a co-birth. This is something none of us have ever done. My primary support will be my husband because he is what I know and he has always been the person, beyond my mom, since meeting him in the second grade that has always been around and willing to deal with all my crap. Oh yeah, we’ve also done this together several other times. Last time when we had our daughter I wouldn’t even let him drop me off while he parked the car out of fear I’d be separated from him for a single second while in pain. That fear itself is interesting to me as in our typical day to day lives we are both highly independent. New to the equation will be full on participation by Lucy in whatever way makes her comfortable. I only say Lucy because even though Ricky will be there too, I don’t see him fully engaged in putting ice chips in my mouth or anything like that. Crazier things have happened in emotionally charged moments though and if he willingly jumps in during a time of my instability due to pain, more power to him.
Does co-birthing this baby make me uncomfortable, yes and no. Yes, only in the sense that I am a high control person and I have to be willing to “let go” in front of Lucy and Ricky in order to get their baby here. Labor and delivery is hard work, it is messy, facial expressions, body parts, and all of that are kind-of distorted and ugly; I’m in survival mode period. My personality can get (more) ugly, I get cross at my husband the F- word could escape. I used it so liberally during the delivery of daughter number two that my mom was trying to cover up my mouth in embarrassment while I was in the middle of pushing. I don’t necessarily like the idea of having poor Enzo’s parents witness any of that but they can’t not be there either this is their son’s birth. It is something I can’t let bother me because in the end if I tried to perform or be a certain way during the delivery it just wouldn’t be real or right. Plus, with everything else going on, I just wouldn’t have the energy.
If I had my way I’d be one of those women you see on the Discovery Health channel sitting in the birthing pool cool, calm, and collected opening her eyes wide with excitement saying in a soft whisper, “The baby is crowning, please get ready to catch him. I’m going to give one good push and then he will be here.” It’s a lofty goal but the reality is that it is one I doubt I reach this time around, I know myself better than that. Let’s just assume the pictures the photographer will capture will be interesting to say the least.
So, we need to talk more with our midwife but as I’ve mentioned before I’d like to experience a water birth if possible. If that gets to be the case when Enzo arrives we are assuming that instead of putting him on me that Lucy will be right there to put him on her chest. I’m thinking we need to get her some scrubs for the occasion with Easy Bake or Dairy Maid embroidered on them. I’m not sure how fast they will clamp and cut the cord because Lucy and Ricky are wanting to bank and store the cord blood. At whatever point he is detached from me I believe that Lucy and Ricky and their birthing assistant will go into the suite next to mine that they have reserved to assess Enzo (I know that the pediatrician in Lucy will have already assessed him from head to toe the minute he arrives), clean him up, and begin nursing and bonding with their new baby. I imagine I will be in my room finishing up delivering the placenta, getting stitched up if necessary, and getting myself generally put back together. The Husband will be happy to fully have his wife back very shortly but sad at having to share again with me any designated driver duties. I’ve mentioned the wine right? I wonder if they would let me bring in a margarita maker? Just kidding. The onset of feel good hormones will rush in after the delivery (the ones that make you not hate your baby for the pain they just put you through) and those feel good hormones in my case will be directed at the happiness of just completing the climb, seeing the Ricardo family with their new little boy, and the feeling of pride for what I was able to do for someone else.
I know that it isn’t easy for anyone that hasn’t been a gestational surrogate to truly believe that last sentence and I will do my best to try to explain in a future blog post (probably after delivery because you won’t believe me now anyway) why I won’t turn to a puddle of mush or find myself committed to the psych ward after this is all said and done. For now, really try to understand that I can really care about someone/something but not want it to belong to me.
